Unforgettable memories

2009-10-13T14:26:00.007+08:00

Haha just come back recently from china!!!!

2009-04-05T23:09:00.005+08:00

LOL.. Some ppl say my blog very boring, cos no pics so i am only uploading pics for today...

2009-04-03T18:20:00.004+08:00

Wishing for a bottle of medicine that can really forget my memories.. I have too much bad memories that i wish to forget.. I seriously need one.. hope the medicine can be invented soon and i am willing to be the first one to test it...haha, I really hope i am a person that can forget things easily.. cos my mind is full of sad memories and my heart is full of scar.. Time is the best healing medicine?

Haiz.. sch is reopening soon, hoping can keep me more busy... Now i am trying to change my mind and soul to a different person but eventually i think is useless for me.. cos the sad memories is still in my... I hate memories... it won just disappear or vanish just like you wan it to be haha.. but i think singing is the only solution that i can put all things aside..

Recently just recieve the msg from a agent company, asking me to prepare for the photo shoot on wed.. but still not confrom yet haha.. Recently, i am finding things to keep myself busy all the time.. this is to stop mi from thinking the past.. but i think is pointless.. haha.. just hope everything will be alright for me..

i was thinking to go travel myself maybe thailand or maybe other places just to get off this "shang sin di" for a moment.. friends are all busy or maybe they don feel like going travel?.. so i think is easier for mi to go alone..

Today is the last time i go clubing... you know why i wanna go clubbing? Becos is noisy it really helps me in puting my mind to rest.. but i always don want people to know what i am thinking so i just tell them i wanna go grind gals.. haha..

i just don know why i am so compLICATED!! when i am still in primary sch, i already behaving like these.. making up story to prevent others from knowing my mind or even my heart.. just don know when i can feel comfortable to open up.. I have already live for 21 years.. maybe ppl say i am still young but i think my heart is older than mi, all the memories bringing me older...

just wish i can settle down faster.. with slience.. in sleep.. Next time if i got the chance to live again, i wanna to be a computer so people can easily delete my memories...

2009-03-29T01:53:00.002+08:00

yoyo.. I am back from genting.. haha.. WAH!!! the things and food there all very EX!!! remember when you guys go there must briing enough cash.. 1 cup noodles cost sing dollars about 3 bucks.. LOL!! I and michele were having fun there, haiz but happy moments always vanish fast.. like water vapour.. I wish the precious moment can hold on till the happiness fill up my heart..

Michele told mi.. she wanted to be friends for the time now.. cos she is tired of relationship.. haiz, me too but i am scared to lose her.. cos i know that some guys is fond on her and wanna to know her more.. when i think of that, my mood is all down to the drain..

she also told mi that after 2 years if i am still single, maybe we can be together again.. when i head that my face is full of joy.. but sometimes we still quarrel.. like in the genting.. when she angry she can say that "don need to wait for 2 years le, i can tell you now we wont be together de" OMG!!! One moment i am like in heaven, another moment i feel like i am in hell... haiz..

I really cant forget about although i tell myself many times to forget her.. haiz.. when i and her in genting my feeling is telling me i really cant forget her smile and everything.. she may not be the perfect woman but she is the one i love in my heart.. i may be stupid but my love is true..

I told her i will wait no matter what.. and i will really wait.. till the day she tell mi " i have no feeling for you anymore" maybe that is the time i have to learnt to pick myself up again.. although my on her and mi is like drama but is real.. I really hate myself for loving someone.. cos my heart have endless love for them.. then i will have endless pain too..

anyway genting is fun... glad i go with her.. so i can conform that my decision is right.. i will wait.. now trying to build up bonds with my old friends.. hope more colours will added in to my rainbow.. haha.. JIA YOU TO MYSELF...

2009-03-17T01:20:00.004+08:00

Today quite is a relaxing day.. I went out with alvin and his cousin to do shopping in town and we eat non stop.. LOL.. going gain weight liao.. actually when guy shop with guy is more better when woman is not around.. I think most guys think so ba.. cos we can talk what we like.. just feel free and easy haha..

I think that woman are really troublesome and hard to understand.. haiz.. they can change their mind and show their tamper easily.. Just hate woman.. why woman always the one who hurt guys.. maybe i am the only one? haiz.. i always bully by woman.. i don't know why? i always give them what they like and give in to them but in the end.. haha.. don really wanna to remember it.. how long i am going to suffer? I just want a gal who love me and be nice to me.. love is so fragile.. people change easily and fast..

I have not contact my ex for 2 days le.. but what I saw from her facebook I think that she can live happier without me.. sometimes i really watn to give up but when i was about to give up, she give mi hope again.. i feeling very tired and hurt.. Just wanted a result soon.. want me to leave or want me to stay.. don make mi wait and wait..

Going to genting with her, but i not sure she will feel happy anot.. but i will try my best to give her a unforgettable memories.. this memories will always store in my mind no matter where i go.. sweet memories are meant to be keep.. maybe one day she will find a better guy than me.. i just hope she get one... someone she loves.. but i think the person is not me.. from her attidute towards me, i think what meant to be over is over... guess i have to move on soon.. but at the same time my care for her will not end till one day she meet a person that can take care of her..

All the best michele.. i know one day you can be as happy when the first time i meet you..

2009-03-14T01:40:00.004+08:00

Yoyo..going to genting next week.. haha.. think i am going to destress over there..stress is catching up to me..so i think i have to take a break over there.. I going with michele, this is what i promise her so i have to do it.. Most important I like the weather there..

Recently, i meet back my sec friends.. finding my life is added with more colours now.. I think i am just a rainbow without any colour but now the first colour "red" is been added and i hope more colour is coming in to colour my rainbow. It means to make my life more meaningful.. haha..

Today i have a bball match with my sec friends and we vs phillipino.. lol we lost badly, simply said is they are good.. haha but i am happy.. this few days I keep listen the same song over and over again, the song xiao jiu wo.. so nice.. keep listening to it...haha btw sch is reopening soon hope I can pick up more colours over there..

michele now is busy working.. hope she can take care of herself.. think don't disturb her is the best thing for me to do.. Yesterday I post a comment at her facebook saying that "If i have a wish, i will wish she stay happy as always.. I mean it..

Sometimes i hate myself for being a quiet person, cos is hard to know more friends with this kind of personality.. haiz.. I just don know how to start a conversation.. or topic to talk.. haiz.. Haha.. think going to sleep soon.. hope i can have a nice dreamz.. night to myself..

2009-02-20T03:03:00.003+08:00

NOw is our holiday for RP, we have a long holiday about 3 months.. nothing to do at home, WTH... i lost my ic, haiz so suai need to go make a new one again.. so many problems chasing after me and i wish someone can tell me what should i do!! cos i need to forget my gf, the actual and correct saying is to learn how to treat her as a friend.. recently i felt that her love to me has slowly vapourise..(don know is good or bad) anyway we are now friends and i really hope that she can be happy without me.. haha...i can feel that she are getting happier and went out with her friends often, her life now is working, hanging around with friends and sleeping haha... good for her, for me i think that i may need to take a long break...

woman sometimes is really hard to understand, they can be happy and suddenly can be angry.. sometimes they get angry and you don know why!! ha..they can do what they likes and you cant,haha remember guys, being love by someone is always the fortunate thing that you will ever wish.. people always tend to lose something then they will know the value of that thing.

I wish that i am a person that can take relationship easily and not so serious.., cos i am that type of person will put everything into it, compromise and bear everything for the women i love. But it will always become the opposite.. they will start to complain and yell at me if i nv treat them as usual. I really hope that for once i can also be the person to be love by them.

2009-01-13T14:57:00.001+08:00

Sad case... yesterday just break up with my girlfriend.. actually i don't blame her as i acknowledge that i am really not a good bf... The way that i treat her good is only double her sadness.. I feel so sad when i hear that and immediately i burst into tears... actually we are not compatible, our interest, even our personality,... is different.

We always quarrel and there are also alot alot of misunderstanding between us resulting us to separate from each other. i am just like a wooden cock head that don understand how she feels. Family problem have already pressurized her to suffocating and yet my concern to her is not what she wish for and only double her burden.. she scream in the orchard mrt so loud that awaken the selfishness of me keeping her by my side neglecting her feeling. I try my best to treat her as nice as possible but the result is still the same. I don understand why everytime i give in to her or even my past relationships they always wanted more. where else when guys treat them bad they like it more. WTH!!! haiz..she is a type of woman that need people to initiative understand her.

I told her that I am really sorry that i made her suffer for 9 months and the time we spent only bring her sadness memories. Now we are friends and i really hope that she can live better without me.. For myself, trying to do some reflection and not to go another relation until i have save at least 20k in my bank.

2009-01-08T15:33:00.002+08:00

LOng time nv blog.. Now in Republic poly every day have to wirte RJ so very tired to blog again!! nowadays I noticed that in singapore there are alot of rich people.. with my saving in the bank i am only a small fry compare to them.. I have to work hard!!! OMG RED CLIFF 2 is coming out in 1 days time I WAnna WATCH!!!

Haiz.. today is the last 2 weeks for school.. going to holiday but why am i so sad and sian??? Recently I and my GF quarrel again, we been together for 9 months and she ask for break for around 50 times -_-!! she is a good girl but her tamper is very hot!! "ouch" every little thing we quarrel about she wanted to break.. maybe she was right that we really not suitable for each other.. But anyway we both agreed that if the next time we quarrel again and she ask for break again, we will break!! HOpe that things can be better..

2008-10-14T16:31:00.002+08:00

LOL... I GOT MY PAY... WHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! BUT have to save alot because wanted to live a very rich life in the future.. Haiz still studying and struggling to achieve a good grades.. Prepare for the army life in the next 2 years.. OMg... going to watch movie later.. CALL "PAINTED SKIN" heard that it is nice!! LOL.. I WANT TO PARTICIPATE IN THE SINGING COMPETITION LIAO... WHAHAHA Hope i can quilify haha...

2008-09-26T14:26:00.002+08:00

Haha.. i finally blog again... lol.. Now adays i sign on with the army for 10 years... OMG lol.. haiz cos i don know what job to do in the future so i decided to join the army.. My vocation is Amour.. ha.. Now what am i doing?? playing online game and studying to be the top... lol if i can!!! haha... if wan to play online game i recommanded DREAM OF MIRROR.. join me my nick in the game is Banana_king.. haha.. COME!!!

2008-08-14T23:34:00.003+08:00

Haha now holiday... YEA!!! must chiong work le... haha.. thx everyone i will jia you de.. hope the amry faster sign mi so i can slack at hm le.. haha cos now as the place where i work alot of conflict sia... must xiao sin if now later will kanna mi..

2008-08-01T09:05:00.002+08:00

So xin ku... haiz.. just vomit blood, i think i am sick.. yesterday my head pain like hell, today also very pain... haiz.. normally people will said why don't wan see doctor.. but i think is wasting money as i know that it will recover by itself..
See a doctor will cost me about 50++ which i don want.. sometimes i even no money to eat.. why should i see a doctor to watse this kind of money.. At home i have medicine which i think can help me to recover.. ha.. BTW IN THIS WORLD EVERYONE IS SELFISH.. this is what i think.. NO ONE WILL HELP YOU UNLESS YOU HELP YOURSELF..

2008-07-30T15:06:00.002+08:00

Not feeling well now... sometimes i really feel sad.. cos whenever i need her she wont be there for me.. What is the difference between man and girl.. both are human who need care, love and concern... why the person i need doesn't fill it up for mi.. in the past, in the future or now.. i always do things for them without asking them to repay.. all i want is some love, care and concern. If i was given a choice i really wish i can become strong and independent. HAiz..

2008-07-29T14:32:00.002+08:00

So sad!!!!!! haha... i cried..what should i do??? sian... What did i do wrong.. WHY!!!!! i really din know how to make you happy again!!

2008-07-28T22:32:00.002+08:00

Haha now at my working place studying my science UT.. so stress.. but i still have to endure.. today my dear throw tamper on mi.. haha i don know why.. but feel abit sad.. but is ok cos i love her.. i hope she can be happy just like when i know her.. tml ut test must jia you le.. next sem change class le.. hope that she can take care of herself.. and don pit so much stress in herself to make herself more pek chek.. Jia you my dear..

2008-07-17T16:36:00.002+08:00

Today is another tiring day.. haha.. haiz.. so tired.. tml i have to go for my comando selection.. hope i can pass.. i think that it is quite tough lei especially the phycial motto.. haha.. die liao..

2008-07-16T13:04:00.002+08:00

What should i do to improve my relationship.. haiz.. my girl friend keep having the mindset saying that we are not competible.. She think that having too much quarrel means different thinking... what i do she all don like, what i talk she all don like... what should i do.. i trying my very best to make her happy.. i like to see her smile and laughter.. but all her laughter is not with me.. being with mi izit so bad.. what i have done to deserve all this.. when she happy, i will happy.. haiz.. i really don know how to make her happy again.. i really sad.. what should i do...

2008-07-15T18:13:00.002+08:00

Haha today i have a big quarrel with mt dar.. my tears have drop.. ha.. in my mind there is always this question that i wanted to ask.. why people always remembered the bad things but not the good things... and when they lose it then they will remember all the good things instead of the bad things.. haha.. today in school doing the VB Code.. wtf.. i don know anything about it.. haha.. i have to keep improving my relationship with her.. this is what i going to do next in my life goal.. cos i love her...

2008-07-15T08:47:00.003+08:00

Yea!!! is a long time since i blog.. haha... somtimes i ask myself single better or go into a relationship.. i think that a relationship is just like a sinking mud.. once you step in you can;t get out.. if you force to pull yourself out, you will only get yourself hurt.

Fate can decide everything?? if can i really wish i can twist back the clock and go back in time... i really think that my life is meaningless.. i wish i can be strong and i wish i can be happy.. but why is always temporary..

sometimes i really think that blog can help me release my stress and it is a good way to comfort my sadness. most of all no one can see through my thoughts..

2008-06-08T20:08:00.003+08:00

haha long time nv blog le.. wa i now got Gf le haha.. look like my first stead.. now working two part time job.. haiz so tired.. need to earn more money lei.. haiz.. the soccer debt i think don need to return le ba cos the company close le.. haha so happy... now currently working in eng wa and sun plaza.. haha anyway. jia you to mi ba...

2008-04-10T13:42:00.004+08:00

HAHA start school le now currently study in Republic poly.. today is the 4th day le... Every day we doing the same thing lol.. always projuct.. the first prject i score D lei.. Wtf?? D=fail maybe i don know wad teacher wan ba.. haiz but is ok la.. still need to work hard.. lol.. now happily study lo.. i also meet new friends.. lol..

2008-02-10T04:38:00.000+08:00

Ha..2008 already long time nv blog about 8 months le ba... how am i now?? ha BROKE!!! lol.. cos recently lose soccer bet about 3k... siao, how i going to return sia.. haiz... finally i broke with my ex.. i make my choice in the end.. i nv regret cos i think i have make a right decision.. we both really not suitble for each other.. she likes guy with money but i like girl with true love..lol.. haiz recently i got a friend jia yan..we also have misunderstanding through out a incident.. forget it ba anyway we solve it le.. now going to graduate le.. lol soon also have to go army le... lol.. my another part of my life is coming soon...

2007-08-06T01:11:00.000+08:00

Do you know who can really affect your thinking and can hurt you the most?? the ans is the people that close to you.. recently my gf say i am a disgrace to her as i have no money..And when she and her friends chat and they talk abt their bf.. she feel more angry cos i don have money.. and she told mi (why i choose you?? other people bf give them money to shopping how abt you?? and i have to give you money to eat.. you making mi lose face in fornt of them.. haiz i also no face to tell them abt you..) izit hurting?? people around mi ask mi to break with her but do you guys know abt love?? love is not a thing you can just give up.. even when the person you like treats you as a shit.. you will still love her..and that feeling is cant be decribe.. today we go eat supper.. we have a little quarel cos when she told mi something i misunderstand it.. so she was very angry and don feel like toking to mi.. until her ex bf msg her imagine how she react?? smile happily and talk to mi.. how you guys will feel.. sometimes i told myself.. to her what am i?? i told myself maybe someday she will realise i how i treat her and she will treat mi good?? WORNG.. this is the conclusion i have make.. now i don know wad to do.. continue loving her or ....

2007-07-26T02:52:00.000+08:00

haha long time no blog le...haiz recently break with my gf.. but patch back le... so guilty cos nv go sch today.. haiz.. i must wake up le.. if not will be debar.. so sad to make the decision to break with her..when i break with her so many ppl happy for mi.. but i still cant really let go of her.. maybe is becos i love her ba.. haiz..so i patch b.. ha..

2007-05-21T17:42:00.000+08:00

i don know wan happen between mi and my gf.. i was sad when she say her feeling towards mi have faded...wad should i do?? the sadness in my heart i don know how to decribe.. all i wanted to tell her is i love her lots lots.. i really hope we can last long.. i was serious about her.. sometimes i don know wad to do.. she tell mi to give her 1 week to think wheather she still wanna continue with mi anot.. this one week is the darknees to mi.. very very worried... haiz wad to do...have to wait.. sometimes the tears just roll down my cheeks..thinking of her every sec,min,hr,ha..sick right... this is the last gf i will have ba if really break up..i won give myself a chance to get into relationship again i swear..

2007-05-12T05:31:00.000+08:00

Hiaz... i am really not a person can keep promise.. i make my gf sad today.. i am really sorry.. sometimes i really wanna to tell you seriously to find a better person who can take care of you and make you happy.. anyway i am just a jerk..

2007-05-06T01:31:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. today feeling weird.. i don know wad to say and cant really do anything.. my girlfriend today going mos with her friends at midnight..actually don really wanna her to go cos so late le.. haiz.. really cant control her and also worry abt her.. feeling sad.. and i just bought a gift for her.. haha.. hope she happy... anyway most important thing is she happy...i know that i am not a good bf..i really don know la.. ha..lets see how ba...

2007-04-29T01:46:00.000+08:00

haha that all abt mi.. wanna know more can view my friendster.. haha

2007-04-27T16:41:00.000+08:00

ha blogging again... today is the 3rd day i dream of my ex girlfriend... i don know why still cant forget her.. i know this is un fair to my gf now.. but i will try hard.. my ex now i think she don not wan to contact mi le ba.. maybe is bcos she wanna forget the past and enjoy her life now.. so sad.. no matter how hard i try to find her.. still nv reply.. sad..

2007-04-24T21:33:00.000+08:00

ha so sad don know why... a person can change so fast... now the problem with my gf slowly float up.. we quarrel recently.. haiz.. sad.. i don know this will go how long.. i so lonely and i don know how to talk to her cos she say that i always make her angry.. haiz...

2007-04-14T20:20:00.000+08:00

haha i now got a girlfriend le.. haha i also don know wad to say.. recently feeling veri sad.. i also don know why... her name call ling ling.. we know each other through a friend call zi jian.. haha the rest don need to say le ba.. she is a nice girl but don know how to present her feeling.. mi too. haiz.. hope this is my last girl friend ba... jia you gogo!!!

2007-03-03T23:39:00.000+08:00

haha long time nv blog le.. wa so sian this few days don know wad to do... lol my friend go AUS for one month lei... lol... i think i wan to jian fei in this one month ba.. later she come back may see the difference.. whaha.. then she will get a shock

2006-12-28T21:29:00.000+08:00

OMg school going to reopen le... so sain... hope that it will last longer... i just watched the deathnotes 2 le... lol they say 28 dec then it starts but i watch it 3 days ago... and it really quite nice... they acting is good but too bad the main character all die in the end... lol... mi so sain now i am all alone so somtimes really feel loney... luckily i still got too work so can waste my time... hope that times fly fast can i can forget everting...

2006-12-19T20:23:00.000+08:00

haha so long never blog le... lol now busying working no time to blog.... everything is over have to start anew le.. lol my blog got song le...hee.. now planning to oraganize BBq for my class.. counted as gathering ba.. cos we now having holiday.. everybody busying doing their own things so have to gather if not friendships will be decrease... lol.. this few days watching show.. cos have to relax too.. Recently i went movie with my friends we caught a show called Eragon.. lol very nice is abot dragon..

2006-12-05T13:20:00.000+08:00

Wah so stress yester just finish my WAD exam... i thought i know but actually i don know.. so i was veri stress.. but i work hard during the week end so maybe can pass my exam or even score high.. haha so happy.. but tml going to have my BCM exam.. but it is a listening exam.. it is very hard.. cos is a vedio... haiz have to work hard le cos now i am all alone le i have to count on myself le.. quite lonel but have to used to it.. haiz it just same as i have to pay the school fees my self and hanphone bills+allowence.. all by me.. so stress stress stress stess!!!!

2006-11-27T09:05:00.000+08:00

Today is 27 nov... today late again.. die le keep getting late recently.. work and school.. so tired.. haiz to me i think my dream is going to awake soon.. the important person to me is leaving me soon.. she is going to awake mi le.. no matter how hard i try is useless le.. so sad.. really sad.. but no matter wad i really hope her to be happy.. take care ling...

2006-11-24T10:49:00.000+08:00

haha nowhaving lesson yesterday chating with my friends at (L.D.F) lao di fang.. ha the place we always go..having fun there.. dicussing abt the bbq having on this coming sat.. ha thinking of it makes me hungry.. i also having a bad time yesterday cos of some personal problem..haiz.. hope there everything will be smoothly go for mi... the lesson now very tough this stupid "php" thing make mi so confuse.. ha.. have to work hard le..

2006-11-22T09:31:00.000+08:00

haha now in sch again.. so sian now learning HTML... quite hard but got to jia you... yester play dota to very late.. but quite fun... cos there is a new map 6V6.. we play till 2am.. ha.. nowadays work getting harder and harder le.. hope can hoilday soon.. at Dec 18.. yester i was so busy i have to cut my hair and have to rush to environment building to appeal for the summon that i got.. shit... haiz.. but is over le.. today will be better..

2006-11-20T09:40:00.000+08:00

Today is 20 Novmember.. i at lesson now.. yesterday was caught in the rain.. so today got abit flu... i plan a surprise for one person.. yesterday i use some fire craackers to some words for her and was caught in the rain... i hope that wad i do can make her happy and have confidence in herself to pass her exam...i decorate a "jia you" for her and ask her to look down from her hse there... hope i can "gan dong" her...

2006-11-16T15:47:00.000+08:00

Now still having lesson, raining outside.. my heart stiill think of ling again... ha.. not sure whether she got see my blog... but wad i going to say is ask her to wait for mi.. don forget me.. most important our memories... ling after your exam, i will make you feel that you are the happiest girl and most fortunate girl in the world... I onli wanted a chance thats all.. i hope that you can give mi this chance.. But no matter wad is the result.. i will still take care of you and concern you forever de...

2006-11-16T10:57:00.000+08:00

today is 16 nov 06 today i am late to school... the stupid cab cost me abt 20 dollars... broke le.. and today got the hair check.. i style my hair to prevent form getting caught.. but in the end hair check is cancel.. shit!!!! waste my time.. today is a suai day for mi... sob :(

2006-11-15T08:57:00.000+08:00

Ha.. today is 15Nov i now having lesson... very boring.. thinking of someone that is really very important to me... i not sure about my future whether can live with her?..but i hope that... ha ha... anyway jia you to myself...
today really sian my lesson ends at 5.... wah!!! still got long way to go... shit man... haiz... must jia you le..

haha that is me!!!!

2006-11-14T15:07:00.000+08:00

haha... today another boring day ... today date is 14 nov.. it is a tiring day as i have to study from 8am to 3pm..at school keep falling a sleep.. haiz teacher give another project work to do again sian... have to work hard le :)

My Memories

2006-11-10T09:35:00.000+08:00

Today is 10 of november 2006..It is my first time to blog..my name is derek this year 18,haha i got lots of memorable things...i remember that in 2003 when i start to work i found that earning money is hard but after you get your pay everything is pay off. Ha i am sure many ppl are thinking this too.... that time for my pay is onli $3.50... what the.. after 1 year my pay was $3.55 i was angry like hell.. for 1 year 5 cents.. whahaha.. but now is different 1 can earn maybe a few hundred dollars per day.. as i was working as a promoter.. it is quite a good job most important is i like it.. it doesn't matter the pay is concern abt are you working happily... outside ppl likes to backstap so must be careful k... ha..